Saturday, January 29, 2005


arh....... matey.......... in the spirit of nerdy tales I would like to post a little white paper. I think its fitting.


so, after dealing with a nearly 2million dollar problem at work that finally got resolved, I am faced with a new job opportunity handed to me on a silver platter. on friday the super big boss man pulled about 10 of my colegues and me into a room and pitched a new postion that is opening in management. it will be a 1.5-2 year position over 10 employees in a part of the building I've never been. after talking about it with one of my friends at work I think i'm going to drop my name in the hat. the only other guy I know of that will go for the postiion will probalby actually read this blog, so to the C-man I say "may the best man win" =)

heres my problem. I got bumped from jury duty last week to having to call this week. I called friday night to find out that i have to go to jury duty on monday, the very day I need to grease the wheels at work to get the new job, so the ol' C-man just may beat me out! argg.......

I'm thinking of telling the judge I'm in favor of the death penalty for jay walking so they will drop me. any other ideas on how to get out of this? I need em quick as monday is the big day.

Friday, January 28, 2005

Google Video

Google Video offers a way to search the closed captioning of TV, and returns screenshots. I can't wait until it returns video clips (as the name would suggest) so I can get just what I want, when I want. this would be the ULTIMATE video on demand.

tropical island

One of my coworkers got a call at work the other day asking for someone that no longer works here. now this is a rare occurance because our internal phone system responds to voice commands, so if you say someones name it rings their desk. We all wondered how he could get a call meant for a long gone individual, so we picked up the phone, asked for the ex employee and low and behold it connected to his desk!. now not to be outdone we tried asking the employee, and he wasn't in the system. so the only way to get him, without knowing his extension is to ask for an ex employee.

well, the person that called him, or I should say the ex employee had an interesting proposal. the offer was extended to move to a tropical island and do manufacturing work. assurances were given over the phone that the current employee was happy with this position, and yes... the rest of his coworkers were as well.

once the conversation had ended we discussed what 'should have been done' as is often than case, and we have come to a joint agreement that if the caller calls again, we should get the offer faxed to the office, so we can post it for amusement.


This week has been very foggy, and during my commute to and from work it has not been uncommon to not really be able to see where I am going because the fog is so thick. This morning was a welcomed exception to the precidence set by the earlier days of the week and I enjoyed an unrestricted view of the landscape on my way. Traveling at about 75mph I was passed by a blue toyota truck. you know the type, not quite full size, but not a minuture truck either. there were 3 full size men packed into the bench seat, tho the law in this particular case should have probably only allowed two. as they pulled around to pass the truck slowed to match my speed and began honking. I looked over to see a centerfold of a woman in more than a comprimized position plastered against the passenger window for me to see. Of all the days that needed dense fog, this had to be the one.

Whats the weirdest stuff you guys have seen in passing cars?

Saturday, January 22, 2005

racing stripes

so we are watching this movie racing stipes, and the best part by far (so far) is this scene with two fighting flys (they are brothers). The film is about a horse... err I mean ZEBRA that grows up on a farm and he wants to be a race horse. all of the animals have voices (english). besides the flys, the pelican named goose is pretty good too.

Friday, January 21, 2005


Have you ever had one of those weeks where it just seems all your doing is working? well, i'm stuck in one of those weeks. the never ending nightmare of work+work. one would think this is a great thing, some days I wake up (at work) around 2pm, the day mostly gone. on a typical day that would mean its about time to start wrapping things up for my 4:30 departure (yeah.. I need some time).. but alas.. this week has been horendous. I'm helping to finish a project that has been in more than 6 months of development and we are to the part of the project where my skills shine, but I'm too busy with ANOTHER project that is just getting start..or i WOULD be busy with that project if I wern't review another friends project that is closing and desperatly needs my input as it will effect me in the long run... oh.. I mis-typed yet again. all that WOULD be loading me down, except I'm in the middle of a hairy finger pointing 2million doller super problem. oh yeah.. i'm also teaching an OPamp class to the technicians, and I totally screwed up the first session. (maybe because I was thinking about one of those third party reviews I said I'd do, but never got around to). welp.. just one of those weeks. if I really hang in there and make the executives happy, I may get a 25$ gift card to best-buy! ohh........... the reward. I Just can't wait.

Monday, January 17, 2005

Mystery Trip Revealed

The mystery event? I showed up before 7:30 (when I usually start after 8am) just to make sure I was here will in time for the 'mystery event'. We were suppose to wait at our desks (or respective areas) until our section was called over the inhouse PA system, but that system seemed to be a bunch of crap. We were to report to our designated fire drill area outside, but again, that was a bunch of crap. When I got to the department I let everyone know a school bus was parked in our fire drill area so without waitin for the announcement over the PA we packed up and headed out. we tried to board the bus in our area but leadership personell directed us to the bus at the front of the line.

I came to the conclusion that a 3rd grades legs are much shorter than mine by the following. I sat down, legs wedged on the seet in front of me. the guy in front of me did the same thing, the guy behind me did the same. is what you effectivly get is a WEDGE through all the seats. its a wonder any of us got out.

The bus driver was amused that we did not know our destination, but seconds from pulling out we learned the destination of the outing. The local theater had been rented, and we all got a choice of the currently showing films. Upon arriving at the theater we were given complimentary drinks and candy. that was all that provided, so of course everyone is buying popcorn for 4$ a pop (no pun intended) because no one had breakfast and were hungry. I thought that was pretty funny but just proceeded to eat my candy and drink my soda in a weak attempted to stave off starvation.

We arrived before 8am at the theater. the theater is literally 3 miles from the our building. the shows were scheduled to start at 8:45 so we all sat in a VERY overly warmed theater watching those extremely lame slides of advertisement and movie trivia.

Heres my corporate sponsored trip, personal review of the film Flying Daggers
Yahoo review review

*AWESOME cinemetrogaphy, which is one of the main reasons to see this type of film
*Excessive (but not extreme) use of the color green. That alone will make a certain someone I know want to see it.
*Top notch corriographed fight scenes including the use of bamboo, swords, spears, bow and arrow (very well done), and daggers (duh)
*over the top love interest, almost turns this into a chick flick.

things to note:
*characters NAMEs may be shortened in the subtitle but its still fun to listen for the name onscreen.
*a sword is not a sword, but a machete
*film includes more than a tripple cross
*you can still fight very effectivly with a dagger in your back
*when both genders have long hair and all that is shown in a love scene is 'backs' its very hard to determine who is who.
*weather change can be instantaneous
*The sound for the movie was done in toykyo, but this is a chinese film.

In summary, one awesome film that I will actually consider purchasing on DVD when it becomes available. This in and of itself may not seem impressive, but it will seem more impressive when you learn that I have less than 3 DVDs that I own. Flying Daggers is a bit qwirky at times but that alone will not keep me from using the phrase 'totally awesome' with full confidence to describe it.

Friday, January 14, 2005

Enron Collapse

You guys remember that company called Enron? you know, the guys that made it cool to go under. the way mci followed suite...... ah, but I digress.

Enron. I got a book on tape from the library that is 12 cassette tapes on the rise and fall of this behemoth. I'm in the middle of the third tape and the correlation to the company that employs me is STAGGERING. its freaky. but, in a strange kind of way I keep listening as it may kind of predict what will happen to me.

let me give you an example. Enron used forced ranking of employees to a bell curve. this is where you FORCE 10% of the current employees to be rated as L. that could mean Loser, Least effective, Lowly, Loss of Job, what ever. then you make another 70% an H for 'highly valued', middle of the road, average joe. and 20% a T for top talent, the most highly effective portion of the company. well.. the problem enron had with this is that it works GREAT for 1 or possibly two years, but when you have sufficiently brow beat all the 'L' people so that they are fired, take severance packages, or in corporates mind the most ideal situation they just quit (then they don't have to pay severance, OR uneployement).

Well, enron did this, but there was a point of diminishing returns. after a few years you end up cutting GOOD people. when you clean out the bottom all that is left is good people. well share holders got wind of this and enron put a stop to it (this was around 1994 I think). well wouldn't you know it. this year our company has offiicaly put an end to forced ranking. a good 10 years after another corporate someone learned their lesson.

and.. to make you all use google search.. wouldn't you know a 'certain company' PURCHASED Enron Wind when Enron went under.... HMMM.... interesting.

Thursday, January 13, 2005

mystery outing

at work, we are all requested to be at work between 7:30 and 8:05 (why :05?) on monday as the 'planning committe' has planned a mystery event. this is literally all I know.

* business attire
* no physicall activity
* we ride school busses
* we will return at noon
* It will be fun
* It will be really fun
* did I mention it will be fun?

THAT, in a nutshell is what the email said. the following are rumors as to what will commence:

* as our busses leave the plant on monday morning, we will be passed by busses going back to the plant full of chinese people

* the busses will drop us out in the snow 10 miles out and make us walk back

* a movie

* a show

Those are some pretty lame predictions (with the exception of being replaced by Chinese) so I came up with my own prediction. I think they will buss us to the local movie theater where we will screen a movie/TV episode for a different division of the company. heres my thought process... they will be officially entertaining us, but in great corporate america fashion will really be exploiting us at the same time. If such a thing happens I imagine we will have to fill out some 'how was it' survey so they know how to market it or wether the show primer should air. what do you guys think i'll be doing monday morning? oh yeah.. our plant has about 800 people. broken up between day shift and swing shift. we are comprised of about 1/3 executive, management, desk jokeys, phone people, engineers... and probably 2/3 production personell.

Monday, January 10, 2005

MSFT Stolen software

Thanks to a link on I was pointed to an article on that talked about microsofts stolen agenda.

You're not going to be able to believe your ears when you find out that nine of the WAV audio files located in the Help\Tours\WindowsMediaPlayer\Audio\Wav directory in the Windows installation media were created using a cracked version of Sound Forge 4.5! Whilst I certainly haven't checked yet, Tomshardware swears that if you open the files in a HEX editor or with notepad, the last line signature reads "000-04-06 IENG Deepz0ne ISFT Sound Forge 4.5" which has been confirmed by Tom's sources as genuine, and belonging to the cracker Deepz0ne. It’s not entirely certain where this one could go, given that its not too clear who is liable legally.

link to article.

Friday, January 07, 2005

Hankook Snow Tires

I dunno what it is, maybe its all the snow that has me stuck on tires, but I'll give you all a rundown on the tires I have on the GOLF. they are Hankook Zovac HP W401 Tires. I've looked all over for a review of them but was able to find very little. I did read some user reviews on but it was kind of mixed. besides the fact that the studs are LOUD i can't find a single thing wrong with them. they even have the little snow symbol on the sidewall which means they were actually tested and pass the highest rating for traction.

that made me happy. I think I payed close to 500$ total. This included a new [winter] set of rims, 70$ per tire, 10$ per tire to put the studs in, new hubcaps, and road hazard warrenty. at the time it was the ONLY tire I could find that fit my car that took Studs. I went to at least 3 tire stores, but ended up buying everything from a little ma/pop tire shop that has since changed hands so my warrenty is probably no good. I read some at and was glad to see that most everything I have learned about snow tires was confirmed by an [ex?] rally racer.
*no matter what kind of car you have you need good tires to STOP
*best tires always go on the rear
*bad tires on front make you understear (preferred)
*bad tires on rear make you overstear (as in spin/slide out = BAD)
*buy 4 snow tires at a time
*some states don't allow studded snow tires
*get a snow tire with the winter snowflake thing
*all season tires are not snow tires
*once a studable snow tire has been driven without studs you can no longer put studs in. so if you want studs, make sure they are installed when you purchase the tire!

my car has over 25,000 miles on these tires (with studs) and I still have very good tread. and when I put the tires on this season (3rd season) I didn't notice any missing studs.

My thinking is when the tires start to lose the studs i'll remove the studs and finish them off as summer/allseason tires

LOTR Monopoly

so one of jens aunts sent us lord of the rings edition of monopoly! YEAH! I thought jen hated monopoly but she doesn't.. (somehow that communication got scrampled). the LOTR edition actually came with a ring and it plays into the game a little, so that should be fun.

The ring starts on the equivelent of Baltic avenue. I think thats what the first spot is called on the traditional board. I dont' have a the first generation game so I can't compare. the properties are all named after lord of the ring stuff... anyway, the ring starts there. if someone lands where the ring is they get the property for free if it is not already purchased. the "1" position on one of the DICE is replaced with an EYE, if you role this it counts as a one when you count up the die, but the ring moves to the next property.

when the ring reaches equiv of boardwalk the game is over and you count cash/holdings. that should be interesting. we were talking about the rules and did you guys know that in WAY OLD official rules you could actually build without having a monopoly? jen wouldn't believe this but one year when we were at her dads house he pulled out an ANCIENT set of monopoly, half the stuff was missing but he still had the rules that said monopoly not necessary to build. so I guess even if you play with official rules your stuck at an impass as to which 'year' of official rules to use! =)

on a side note, the ring included with the game the exact same size as my wedding band, and a bit more attractive too. i'm thinking wearing the lord of the rings piece in place of the band and see if anyone notices. do people look that close at rings? i'm not sure that I would notice if someone else did it. would you?

Thursday, January 06, 2005

opamp signal generator

I need an easy way to drive a speaker for a tone so the headlights don't get left on. theres several methods but this one actually has a calculator! way to go Hyperphysics!

windows antispiware

so everyone knows microsoft buys technology and then releases it as their own. case and point is the new Windows AntiSpyware Beta and it looks like this technology was aquired from Giant AntiSpyWare

Tuesday, January 04, 2005

failed projects

some guy, at some school, did some research on what makes software projects fail and it turns out inappropriate methodology (or technology) was the leading cause for failure. hmm... imagine that. just because something is more powerful (on paper) it may not be for what you are trying to do. I think all too often we feel the need to jump on new technology and we forget that we are throwing away decades of expertise on 'the old outdated system' but we really have a superior product. ok.. that was vague, but read the survey here. found this on

they even have a little worksheet to see if your project will fail or not

Monday, January 03, 2005

Orange Juice

Jen got some walmart orange juice, and since I'm kinda on an anti-walmart kick right now let me explain to you just what my first impression was of this 'juice'.

I'm not sure what you think of when you think of orange juice refinement, but I think it goes something like they pick the oranges, put them in a juicer, juice em to death and then bottle the juice or freeze the concentrate. they then discard the pulp i'm sure. well if walmart juice were in this block diagram I would say that they don't throw away the pulp, instead they put it back through the juicer for 'round 2' and that is where walmart juice comes from... bitter, barely orange remnant that is technically juice, but tastes nothing like it. because that was too hard to draw a picture of I have drawn another to relay my sentiment.